8.30.2005

As I Live and Breathe

Listening to a really sad song by The Streets right now. God, this shit is breaking my heart. I don't know why, but it makes me think of The Office. BBC, of course. Why would a sad love song make me think of the Office? I guess because Tim and Dawn's story (the focus of the show for me) was a sad one for so long, up until that glorious moment at the end of the Christmas special. I was so deliriously happy as I watched them walk hand-in-hand off the set, despite Tim's ill-fitting pants, which only killed a tiny bit of the magic for me.
On a semi-related note, I saw two performances by the band Keane on SNL last weekend (a re-run, I think, with Paris Hilton). I have to say, I found myself falling a bit for their crooner of a frontman. I have no idea if this band is entirely dorky to like, but I'm thinking of buying their album, just based on those two songs, which I've been humming all week. What's so special about these songs, you ask, and what do they have to do with the Office? The songs that I've been softly singing to myself give me a certain feeling.... There's no way to describe this without sounding completely cheesy, so I'll just say it. They remind me of falling in love. That's right. Somehow, they just send me back a few years to when all of my emotions were throbbing and raw. I'm glad love doesn't always feel that way... it's quite exhausting, really. My life now is exhausting in other ways. Fewer turbulent emotions, more physical repetition. Picking up dishes, picking up my child, changing diapers, changing towels and sheets, etc etc, on and on. I'm glad that the love in my life now exists on a simple plane of unconditional acceptance and unshakable stability. I wouldn't have the energy for the all-consuming romance of yore. Still, I appreciate music that can take me back to those days. Because it's nice to remember once in a while that I felt that way. I had a love story, complete with ups and downs, and now I'm living out its much less dramatic conclusion. I guess I'm in the "happy ever after," which, of course, no one in their right mind would trade for the world. A little Keane in my life would help me recall what led up to this point. And that is nice. I hope the songs are short, though, because I can't think about it too long. There is laundry to do, damn it, and toys all over the floor.

2 comments:

Colin Hughes Taylor said...

As a lad whose heart has been breaking in big pieces for the past few days, I can't enough say how beautiful your words are for me to read right now. You and husby are great folks with solid souls who I've always taken great solice in knowing that, however long it may be between our encounters, I can always know that I have two friends with hearts that can't be knocked down by the demons of our everyday lives. Rather, you (and hopefully someday I) find the meaning in every little bit.

Cheers, and much thanks.

The Tricyclist said...

Colin, who is responsible for your breaking heart? Do you want me to rough her up for you? Or, if Pedro the Lion did it, I'll take all of them on too. I lift weights, you know.

We love you and would love to see you more often. It's hard, I know, but please remember that you're welcome to stop by anytime, if you're in the neighborhood, as they say.

Seriously, though, are you going to blog about your night with Pedro? Because not only am I really curious, but I'll probably want to relive it vicariously. Dude, I gots to know what happened!